If planning a first date is already a concern for many, asking a girl out can become even more of a challenge. At some point we run into a girl who leaves us arrowed, but from the beginning we faced a great obstacle: not knowing how to approach, much less getting her to go out with you for the first time.
The most important thing is that in this article you will find the appropriate 7 steps to ask a girl you like out to reverse this situation and succeed when asking a girl to go out with you. You may have already had a couple of failed attempts in the past, or it may be the first time that you are truly interested in a woman you want to date.
There are many buts at the beginning. For example, that you don’t know what to say exactly, that you perceive that the girl is completely out of your league, that maybe she already has a boyfriend, that maybe it’s not the best time. In short, a series of pretexts that do not help at all. In reality, there is only one indispensable requirement in all of this. Do you find it attractive and do you like it? So go ahead. There’s not much to think about it. If you like it, that’s it and then you have to get to work.
How to ask a girl out shouldn’t be such a complex situation, but by thinking twice and every little detail, we complicate the whole picture. Quickly, doubt and fear consume all the energy we bring and spoil the right moment. In the end, it never allows you to ask him anything. Here’s what to do if you want to ask a girl out for the first time:
1. Value their interest in you
Step number one is to find out how interested she is in you. For example, did you notice if he noticed your presence among the group of friends? Was there any eye contact between the two? Any smile? Any positive expression, such as a simple smile, friendly body language, or even recurring eye contact are indicators that she may feel some interest in you. If after exchanging a few words and greetings over several days you see that she is playing along with you, then it is definitely good news. Don’t be afraid to take action and pursue your goal!
The other possible scenario is that the girl you would love to ask out does not give you the slightest sign of interest. On the contrary, she always seems to be annoyed, busy, she takes your body out, she never speaks to you, far from it. In this case, my friend, better give yourself the opportunity with someone else if you do not want to suffer an uncomfortable rejection.
2. How to ask a girl out: take care of your appearance
When you have made the decision and you are sure that you are going to talk to him, take good care of your appearance. Nothing to present yourself disheveled because you will have ruined everything. Women like to see a neat man, who smells good and looks presentable. You can even make a check-list and check box by box so you don’t forget anything. Make sure of the following:
- Wear trimmed and clean nails – With dirty nails, you will not even reach to shake hands.
- Brush your teeth properly – No residue, much less unpleasant breath. When you speak, he must realize your oral hygiene, that in case things flow, he would be safe if he gives you a kiss. Use mouthwash if possible
- Shave – If you don’t wear a beard, make sure you get the razor close. If you grow a beard, then clean it, trim it and line it. It is important that it looks neat. Many women love beards, as long as they are well groomed.
- Ironed clothes – Shirt and pants properly smoothed. That gives the impression that you are a man who knows how to take care of himself and who pays attention to details.
- Clean shoes – Cleaning your shoes will speak more about you than your own words. No dirty or shabby shoes. Make an effort to make them presentable to score three points.
- Fragrance – The sense of smell plays a fundamental role, since smells last longer in our memory than any other stimulus. Use a pleasant perfume with which you can always remember.
- Cool Shower – A shower shortly before seeing your girl will present you fresh and neat.
As you will see, much of the success when it comes to asking a girl out with you is based on cleanliness and your appearance. Your words and the moment you choose to speak to her are the other part of the game. Let’s see then the following point:
3. Choose a free moment
If today is the day you will talk to her, find a time when she is alone. Put yourself in her shoes and think that it could be extremely uncomfortable and intimidating if everyone is in front of her, for example, her best friends. Just imagine that everyone around you is looking at you and judging the decisions you make. So none of that. Play it safe and take advantage when she is alone.
Choosing the right time and place is an opportunity that works in your favor. This way, she is more likely to offer you a more honest answer, either the one you want to hear or the one that will hurt a little. But an honest answer, whatever it is, is worth more than a lie that will later break your heart.
4. Speak honestly
The hardest part of taking this step is finding the right words to pronounce. Many of them probably work very well, but what I can assure you is that there is only one that ends with a resounding failure: not saying anything. Come on, that’s a loser. From starting with a simple and basic ‘hello’, or telling her that she’s pretty, or that you like a garment she’s wearing because it reminds her of one she gave her mother a few years ago, among others.
However, why doesn’t what you say sometimes work? Well, there are many variables. For example, some lines are not successful simply because they are not genuine, they are not honest. When a girl hears a man say those words, she knows they are not convincing. It is impossible that they end up buying that proposal. It seems that women have an additional sense to detect when men try to persuade them with a far-fetched speech and therefore little or nothing sincere.
All, but especially women in these settings, are driven by honesty. When you express your intentions with truth, you generate empathy, the girl is interested and the conversation begins to flow naturally. It is thus so simple and so effective.
And what happens if the situation occurs within a work environment? Well, the same laws don’t apply here. You better learn some techniques and we have it in our article on how to flirt at work.
5. Attitude, posture and confidence
Avoid making the situation seem too relevant and formal. On the contrary, the more casual and calm, the better. Good posture and confidence will give the impression as if you do that every day. It is a question of balance. If you go all out, straight to the point and without anaesthesia, then she will be uncomfortable. Keep your cool and don’t rush the pace because he won’t like that at all and what you’ll hear will be a nasty “no.”
6. What to do if they say no?
There is always the possibility that all your efforts will go to hell, but that’s the way this business is. If he tells you that he doesn’t want to go out with you, then just keep your composure, don’t make a bad face. Rather, be friendly, end the conversation, and leave. You will feel a little down , but come on, that happens and it is best to take it as a learning experience. Find out where you could have failed and analyse what you can improve for your next attempt with another girl you like in the future.
7. She said yes! And now that?
If they said yes, then congratulations! You are the host and you know how to ask a girl out. Joy will invade your body, but it is better not to express it too much. It’s not that you’re going to jump or dance. Just saying that you are happy and excited will do. Have you already thought of any ideas for your first date? If not, I recommend that you read our article of 7 ideas for a first date.